This rusty swimmer needs to jia yo

I thought it would be a good experience to represent my dorm in an all-campus, dorm-against-dorm swim meet last week. Kelvin, the organizer for my dorm, insisted I compete in three races, plus a relay-- the maximum number an individual is allowed. He told me I was Michael Phelps.

Perhaps I was flattered. Perhaps I thought If Michael Phelps could successfully complete eight races in two weeks, surely I can manage four races in four hours. Kelvin also told me that nobody in Hong Kong takes swimming lessons, exponentially upping my extrinsic motivation. So I agreed to race. I had made it to level five in Ms. Beardsly's swim class.

I learned a few things from the ordeal.

1. 200 meters is four laps.

2. If you give up after the first lap, your dorm might not just "laugh it off" like you do. They have a lot more riding on this than you do, apparently...

3. "Jia yo!" is a common term that the audience shouts to encourage swimmers. Supposedly, it means "you can do it," but literally it means "add oil!"

4. If you've never done the butterfly stroke before, it is impossible to "just wing it."

5. This is a lot of people to embarrass yourself in front of...

6. I will now wear a life jacket more often.

If any of this was ambiguous, my first race was the 200 freestyle. I swam one length, stood up in the water and looked around, noticed that I only had a smidgeon of energy remaining, had three races left and six opponents who were already forty meters ahead of me. So, shamelessly, I waved to the crowd and hopped out of the pool. I also opted not to participate in the other events I had signed up for (mostly because I was tired.) I still had lots of fun, I think.

Team America: The Champ: Sunset (NOW WITH POLLUTION ENHANCEMENT!):